In the movies, dating seems so easy. Yet, in real life, the fairy story is not always the case. However, dating really is not complicated; nonetheless, most people are not aware of how they damage their reputation bad first date topics. Knowing beforehand what behaviors to avoid can save you from the mistakes that can cost you a second date with someone you like.
Knowing what not to talk about, as well as what to bring up is important because first dates serve as the beginning of your fairy story. Do not worry so much about what you should say on a first date, but more about certain things not to talk about in first date topics. Going on your first date and the chances are that you are both excited as well as nervous in equal measures, following these 4 simple guidelines will help create a great first date experience.
1. Forget About the Ex
Talking about the past so early into a relationship that has not started is like pouring water on a flame that is barely starting to fluster. Mentioning your ex shows that you are still thinking of them, and are not ready to be back on the dating scene. It just makes a person feel compared to people that should not matter anymore.
No matter how much you dislike, or liked them you should never talk about your ex. Unless you are asked directly, avoid conversations about your ex. In case you are asked, say the briefest, nicest thing you can and cleverly and respectfully try to change the subject. It is wise to wait to talk about it until you have made it official already.
2. Political and Religious Stance
Even though the subject of religion and politics can unite a couple with common backgrounds and values, unless you met at a place of worship or on a political rally, your opinions about your political and religious stance should not be brought up in first date topics.
If you are religious or support a certain political party and only interested in dating someone who shares your views and belief systems, then this conversation should be brought up. A person’s political stance does not define them as a person; this topic can be avoided if you are a person who believes in that there are various ways to interpret the reality we live in.
3. Being Too Self-Effacing
There is nothing more wearisome than listening to hours and hours of someone talking about their flaws. Whining or complaining about how bad, you have been or how bad your life is, may just make you lose any chances you had with him or her. He or she is not your counselor.
Sharing everything negative going on in your life, is just too much information. No one is perfect and everyone has a past. Be the best version of yourself and give your date a chance by impressing him or her. Life may have its vicissitudes. Save your flaws for later. Keep the first date to lighthearted matters, which is what you are on the date for.
4. Anything Negative
When going for the first date, you should never say anything that is negative. It can cast a negative shadow on your date’s first impression of you. Be cautious when discussing anything about what you feel, make sure you are not overwhelming the other person.
Talk about positive things; do not discuss your negative opinions. Being overly negative throughout your first date is a definite route to no follow up date. Keep the conversation light, casual and fun.
When going on a date, remember first impressions do matter. First dates are just like job interviews and public speaking. Ex-relationships, religion, politics, and negative comments should not accompany you in first date topics. It is important to keep this handful of topics out of your date and you are most likely not going to step on one another’s toes. First dates are by no means time to be shy. Keep topics of conversation light and carefree. After all, you do want her to return the favor and ask you out on the second date.